Boating puns: our favourites

Our top 11 favourite boating puns: 

  1. Did you hear about the cargo ship that got a hole in it? had one hull of a problem! 
  2. I used to have a fear of boats, but that ship has sailed. 
  3. The fishing boat had to conform to the other vessels out of pier pressure. 
  4. Why did the admiral decide against buying a new hat? He was afraid of cap sizing. 
  5. I'm not one for buoyancy but whatever floats your boat. 
  6. Vacations were cheaper before steamships, because cruises were always on sail. 
  7. Making a boat out of stone would be quite a hardship. 
  8. Careful, the Loch Ness monster eats fish and ships. 
  9. Submarine commanders really like to submerge themselves in their work. 
  10. Get in the boat... OAR ELSE! 
  11. A couple of punks crashed my boat party the other day. They just barged right in.

because I'm the captain that's why T shirt

Yachting around the world with your sailboat? Anchor at these Boutique Hotels

Onboard, when the wind blows your sails, and the sun shows the direction, you do not need to look for accomodation. Your yacht, beside providing the mean of travel, the place to dine, also treats you with accomodation.

However, when you are ashore, you may consider a boutique hotel a nce fit to your lifestyle. We recommend these websites to look for great deals:

  • Mr and Mrs Smith: they visit and review all their listings, and are open about their and their users opinion. They support your selection with astonishing pictures.
  • Splendia : Not only boutique hotels, but hotels with private beach (to which you could get used to while sailing the seven seas) and design hotels from all over the world.
  • Tablet : Beside the great deals, you will also be able to see beautiful pictures, reviews and whole cityguides for your favourite boutiques hotels in all five continents.
  • Secret Escapes : A bit different, than the three other sites above. Much more of a closed (or semi-closed) club with special deals - which by the way, you can join for free. 
In all the cases you are probably best off, if you check with your selected hotel's front desk directly as well. Many-many cases, they are happy to cut some corners and present you a great deal.

When you finish your onshore adventure, time to board again. Sails up, the sea is waiting to be explored.

Jeanneau Sun Odyssey sailboat in a bay -
Jeanneau Sun Odyssey

2014 USA Boating Calendar and BoatShows

Jan 1-5, New York BoatShow, New York, NY

Jan 9-12 Atlanta BoatShow, Atlanta, Georgia

Jan 16-20, Chicago Boat & SportShow, Chicago, Illinois

Jan 20 Monday: Martin Luther King Day: National Holiday

Jan 22-26 Louisville BoatShow, Louisville, Kentucky

Jan 23-26 Strictly Sail Chicago, Chicago, Illinois

Jan 23-26 San Francisco BoatShow, San Francisco, California

Jan 23-26 Nashville BoatShow, Nashville, Tenessee

Jan 23-26 Kansas City Sport & BoatShow, Kansas City, Missouri

Jan 23-26 Baltimore BoatShow, Baltimore, Maryland

Jan 30 - Feb 2 Minneapolis BoatShow, Minneapolis, Minnesota

Febr 5-9 Atlantic City BoatShow, Atlantic City, NJ

Febr 6-9 Los Angeles BoatShow, Los Angeles, California

Fort Lauderdale Boatshow
Febr 13-17, Miami Yacht & Brokerage Show, Miami Beach, Florida
Febr 13-17 Miami International BoatShow, Miami Beach, Sea Isles Marina
Febr 13-17 Strictly Sail Miami, Miamarina, Miami

Feb 17 Monday: President's Day: National Holiday

Febr 22 - March 2, New England BoatShow, Boston, MA

Feb 26 - March 2 St Louis Boat & SportShow, St Louis, Missouri

March 7-9 Greater Philadelphia BoatShow, Oaks, Philadelphia

March 20-23, Palm Beach International BoatShow, Palm Beach, Florida

March 26-30, NorthWest SportShow, Minneapolis, Minnesota

Apr 25-27, Suncoast BoatShow, Sarasota, Florida

May 26 Monday: Memorial Day: National Holiday

July 4 Friday: Independence Day: National Holiday
BoatShow Croatia

Sept 1 Monday : Labor Day: National Holiday

Sept 6-8, Tampa BoatShow, Tampa, Florida

Sept 19-22 Norwalk BoatShow, Norwalk, CT

Oct 13 Monday : Colombus Day: National Holiday

Nov 11 Tuesday: Veterans Day: National Holiday

Nov 27 Thursday : Thanksgiving day: National Holiday

Boating and Yachting Quotes

There are a lot of mysterious things about boats, such as why anyone would get on one voluntarily. ~ P.J. O'Rourke (Holidays in Hell))

In Western Australia they don’t even know how to make that vital piece of sailboating equipment, the gin and tonic. ~ P.J. O'Rourke (Holidays in Hell))

A lot of people ask me if I were shipwrecked, and could only have one book, what would it be? I always say 'How to Build a Boat'- Stephen Wright

The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails. - William A. Ward

Twenty years from now you will be more disppointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. - Mark Twain

The lovely thing about cruising is that planning usually turns out to be of little use. - Dom Degnon

"Cruising has two pleasures. One is to go out in wider waters from a sheltered place. The other is to go into a sheltered place from wider waters." - Howard Bloomfield

One of the best temporary cures for pride and affection is seasickness." - Henry Wheeler Show

"The sea finds out everything you did wrong." - Francis Stokes

"Land was created to provide a place for boats to visit." - Brooks Atkinson

There are three sorts of people; those who are alive, those who are dead, and those who are at sea. - Old Capstan Chantey attributed to Anacharsis, 6th Century BC

The cure for anything is saltwater – sweat, tears, or the sea. - Isak Dinesen

Men in a ship are always looking up, and men ashore are usually looking down." - John Masefield

Any damn fool can navigate the world sober. It takes a really good sailor to do it drunk." - Sir Francis Chichester

"There are only two colors to paint a boat, black or white, and only a fool would paint a boat black." - Nathanael G. Herreshoff

The wind and the waves are always on the side of the ablest navigator. - Edmund Gibbon

The chance for mistakes is about equal to the number of crew squared. - Ted Turner

When I forget how talented God is, I look to the sea." -Whoopi Goldberg

The perfection of a yacht's beauty is that nothing should be there for only beauty's sake." - John MacGregor
"Only two sailors, in my experience, never ran aground. One never left
port and the other was an atrocious liar." - Don Bamford

The goal is not to sail the boat, but rather to help the boat sail herself. - John Rousmaniere

The only way to get a good crew is to marry one. - Eric Hiscock

"I am a citizen of the most beautiful nation on earth. A nation whose laws are harsh yet simple, a nation that never cheats, which is immense and without borders, where life is lived in the present. In this limitless nation, this nation of wind, light, and peace, there is no other ruler besides the sea."

"You do not ask a tame seagull why it needs to disappear from time to time toward the open sea. It goes, that's all."

The best ships are the friendships

I've met the most interesting people while flying or on a boat. These methods of travel seem to attract the kind of people I want to be with. Hedy Lamarr

Being on a boat that's moving through the water, it's so clear. Everything falls into place in terms of what's important and what's not.- James Taylor

When I was a kid, I was obsessed with this idea of opening a restaurant back in Indiana on a little pond. The guests would order their dinner and then take a little boat out with a colored flag on the front of it. When the matching color of the flag on their boat went up on a flag pole, their dinner was ready! - Greg Kinnear

The desire to build a house is the tired wish of a man content thenceforward with a single anchorage. The desire to build a boat is the desire of youth, unwilling yet to accept the idea of a final resting place. – Arthur Ransome

I have had to pass a considerable portion of my life aboard small craft of various kinds, and after a long and mixed experience of the life, I have come to two very definite conclusions concerning it. One is that life on a small boat in fine weather is the only kind of life worth living. The other is that, in bad weather, it’s just plain hell. – Weston Martyr

“I grew to judge every purchase by how many bronze screws I could buy for the boat if I didn't spend on this or made do without that.”  ― Lin PardeyBull Canyon: A Boatbuilder, a Writer and Other Wildlife

Interesting facts about boating

90% of Americans live within an hour of navigable water

35.000: the total number of boat ramps in the US. 2x the number of golf courses.

3,5 million: miles of rivers in the United States, that boaters can use. This is enough to circle the globe 140 times. 

There is also 51 million acres of lakes and 88.000 miles of coastal shoreline.

More American fish, than play baseball and basketball combined

Boaters and anglers are significantly more satisfied with their marriages, relationships and friendships – and are more likely to have a close relationship with their children – than those who don’t boat or fish.

Boaters and anglers are more likely to recycle, carpool and donate money to environmental organizations than people who aren’t boaters and anglers.

Boating is ranked as one of the TOP 3 stress revealing activities

Nearly one-third of U.S. adults go boating each year, the number is growing nearly two percent year by year.

The average boater spends 17.2 days with boating a year, with the average outing 5.2 hours at one time.

Americans own approximately 18 million recreational boats.

Rule of Thumb: Nautical legend has it that the phrase “rule of thumb” came when ship masters never allowed themselves to get closer to an obstacle than the width of their thumb on a chart.

A nautical mile is 6,076 feet, which corresponds to one minute of latitude, and so makes navigation computations easier.

The Recreational Boating and Fishing Foundation
The National Marine Manufacturers Association

Can I rent out my boat, if it is financed / there is a mortgage on it / if it is leased? (FAQ)

In general: yes. In more details: Maybe :)

Having a boat, that is leased or finnced in any other way,  means that you have a responsibility for the condition of the boat in the eyes of the financing organization. Your contract most probably states, that you have to keep your boat is a good condition, to maintain its value at the highest possible level during the financing period.

Letting out your boat frequently, or turing it into a charter may affect the condition of your boat. The people renting it out, may handle it with a bit less care, than if it was their own yacht.

To cover this risk, boat financing companies, (like Essex Credit) created a financing option, available for private individuals as well, who would like to rant out their boats, to make some income or simply to cover the costs of their all-year boating.

The financing option is called: Limited charter.

It allows you to rent out your boat for a maximum of 20% of its time (which means practically no more than 73 days a year) without having to turn your financing option into a more complex Charter financing or Charter Fleet financing option.

If you are interested in renting out your financed or leased boat, we highly recommend to talk about these options to your boat financing company.

Essex Credit boat financing

Do I need a driver's licence to drive a boat? (FAQ)

In Florida (USA), if you were born before 1988, you do not need any licence or certificate to drive a powerboat (except some special categories of powerboats).

However we still strongly recommend, that you take a theoretical and practical training before your first boating experience. Imagine driving a car without knowing who has the right of way at a crossing? Or which are the roads you can take, and which side of the road you should drive at?

Boating is no different: there are rules, which, if all boaters keep, life on the water turns into a great way of spending your time. However if you do not know these rules, your boating may turn into serious financial loss or even danger to human life.

Where to have a great training?

Recreational Powerboating Association
In the USA you can turn to your local Recreational Powerboating Association for some advice on the best and most fitting trainings for your needs. They have a "Welcome to the water" program, that includes several type of learning options for you.

Discover Boating logo

Their project: Discover Boating will help you not only in trainings, but in getting started, finding a boat, buying a boat and in all aspects of owning and operating a boat.

Los Angeles boat rental

Los Angeles is a beautiful city, famous for way too many things: you can spend your day having fun in Universal Studios, check out Santa Monica / Venice beach or Beverly Hills. Once there, do not miss the Grove (and the nearby farmers market), the Hollywood Blvd (Kodak Theater, Walk of fame). Hop in your can to visit Malibu & Santa Barbara. Get close to the Hollywood sign, and to the Venice canals. (for more tips: Discover LA)

But what about boating? You definetly do not want to spend your entire day onshore :)

First, do not forget the Los Angeles Boat Show in February!

Yachting in Monte Carlo

Yachting is as important in Monte Carlo, as Casinos and Formula 1 races. In this exclusive city-state you will find 8.000 Monaco national (and 35.000 local residents) with two marinas. Both of the marinas are state owned, berths can be rented on a daily basis  (with a daily fee of 1.200 Euro, Monte Carlo is the world's top 6th most expensive marina). Port Hercule offers 550 berths, while in Frontvieille Harbour 160 yacht can park. So once you arrived to this beautful city, it's time to take a look on boat rental opportunities. Here is a small list of them:

Bespoke Yacht Charter, Burgess Yachts Monaco , Day Charter , Champion Marine , Windward Islands , Pearl Yachting , K&K Superyachts , International Yacht Register , Fraser Yachts Monaco , Charter and Charter , Primo Yacht , the Globe Sailor , CharterWorld , AquaCruise , Rent Yacht , Easy Boat Bookings , Prestige Boat , Happy Charter , Royal Yachting , B&Y Yachts , Yacht Hire & Charter , Riviera Excellence , Royalty Yachts , Dream Yachting , West Med Yachts , CSO Yachts , 212 Yachts , Dark Pelican 

Marinas in Monte Carlo, Monaco:
Port Hercule , Frontvieille Harbour

Boats for rent on Hilton Head Island, SC

Planning on spending a week or two at the beautiful coast of South Carolina? A spot, not to be missed is Hilton Head Island. Famous for great golfing, excellent food, nice weather all around the year and superb hospitality. Once you played all the greens, and tasted the fresh seafood served in the authentic, family run restaurants of the island, and had some great coctails in the beach bars, make sure you do not miss the opportunity to hit the azure waters for some fishing, sailing or simply for the fun of it. Where can you do this? Here are some tips for boat renting on Hilton Head Island:

Harbour Town Powerboats , Commander Zodiak , Palmetto Bay Watersports , Carolina Coastal Activities ,  Sky Pirate Parasail , Integrity Charters , Harbour Town Adventures , Vagabond Cruise , H2O Sports , Live Oac , Captain Hook , Captain Marks Dolphin Cruise , Palmetto Lagoon Charters , TopGun Charters , Top Shot Sportfishing , Pirates of Hilton Head , Papa Bear Charters , Low Country Nature Tours , Marsh Grass Adventures , Hilton Head Island Tours , Outside Hiton Head ,  Matthews Marine , Hiton Head BoatHouse , Lighthouse Yacht Sales , Amick's Deepsea Fishing , BullRiver Cruises , Shooner Welcome , Top Fishing Charter , Skimmer Charter , Standard Bay Charters , Miss Judy Charters , NuYacht 

Explore Hilton Head 

Yacht Clubs on the island: 
Harbour Town Yacht Club , South Carolina Yacht Club , The Yacht Club of Hilton Head , Hilton Head Plantation Yacht Club

Rent a Boat in Brighton, UK

Thinking about renting a boat in the UK? Head south from London (after taking a look at Big Ben, the Tower Bridge and Camden Town), enjoy the hour-long train ride, through the beautiful countryside. Once you start to notice hills (and tunnels of course, in which the train takes you trough), get prepared, as you will soon arrive to the beautiful city of Brighton (& Hove), the gem of English seaside. Enjoy a great fish & chips on the beach, visit the Royal Pavilon and the Brighton Pier, and start to look for Brighton Marina: the place to find your next rental boat.

Solent Charters , Brighton Yacht Charter , Champagne Charters , SeaBreeze3 , Adventure Connections Motorboats , Adventure Connections Sailboats , Barracuda Yacht Charter , Boat District offers , Brighton Charter Fishing , Brighton Diver , The Great Escape , Royal Eagle , Sussex Marine Watersports , the Brighton Watersports , Lagoon Watersports , Charter Boats in Brighton , 

Boat for Rent - Tampa Florida

Boat for Rent presents you a wide choice of boats, yachts or sailboats for rent in the Tampa area. Once you arrive to this beautiful location with crystal waters and endless sunshine, you definetly want to get more of it. So why don't you treat yourself with a day or a week of boating? As you leave the crowded beaches behind and heading for the sunset, you have the time of your life. We recommend you these great places to rent a boat from:

Windsong boat & Kayak rentals , Tampa Bay Boat Rental Co , Island Marine Rentals , I. C. Shark Boat rentals , Bradenton Beach Marina , Manatee Mobile Marina , Cannons Marina , IRB Boat Rentals , Not Just Tampa , Tierra Verde Boat Rentals , Windsong Sailing Charters , Carefree Boat Club , Yacht Starship , Frenchy's Jetski and Boat Rental , Surfing Gator , Dolphin Landings Charter Boat Center , Pick a slip , Tampa Bay Bat and Jetski rentals , Docksearch , Dolphin Marine Rentals , Suncoast Adventure Center , Boat Rental Tampa , Slips with Lifts , The Hull Truth Boating ans Fishing forum , Anclote Adventure Boat Rental , Dixie's Boat Rentals , Find Exotic Rentals , Jack's Boat Rentals , Gulf Coast Boat Club , Freedom Boat Club , Watersports Florida , Tampa Tours , Marinas ,  PortBooker , Galati Yachts , Florida Rental Boat , Tampa Bay Boating , Sunset Cruise Sarasota

Yacht shows and boating events

Boat for rent boat show

Boat for Rent presents: Upcoming boating events, which are truly worth renting a boat for. 
For a more detailed international list can be found here. If you are interested in USA only, check this link.

Boat Shows:

Miami Yacht and Brokerage Show - Febr 14-18, 2013
Miami, Florida, USA

Geater Philadephia Boat Show - March 8-10, 2013 
Phoenixville, Philadelphia, USA

Tampa Bay Boat Show - March 8-10, 2013
Tampa Bay, Florida, USA
visitor registration: here

Palm Beach International Boat Show - March 21.24, 2013
Palm Beach, Florida, USA

Suncoast Boat Show - April 19-21, 2013
Sarasota, Florida, USA

ShowBoats Design Awards - Jun 2013

Festival de la Plaisance - Sept 10-15, 2013
Cannes, France

Southampton Boat Show - Sept 2013
Southhampton, UK

Monaco Yacht Show - Sept 2013

Barcelona Boat Show - 25-29 Sept, 2013
Barcelona, Spain

Fort Lauderdale International Boat Show - Oct 31 - Nov 4, 2013
Fort Lauderdale, Florida, USA

Marine Equipment Trade Show Nov 19-21, 2013
Amstardam, The Netherlands
includes: Superyacht Pavillion

Antigua Charter Yacht Show, Dec 1-7, 2013
Antigua & Barbuda, West Indies

London Boat Show - jan 11-19,  2014
London, UK

boat show

Rendevous & Regattas:

Loro Piana Caribbean Superyacht Regatta & Rendezvous - March 20-23, 2013
YCCS, Virgin Gorda, British Virgin Islands

Loro Piana Superyacht Regatta - Jun 4-8, 2013
Sardinia, Italy

ShowBoats International Rendezvous,
Atlantis, Paradise Island, Bahamas

Asia Superyacht Rendezvous, Dec 16-18, 2013
Phuket, Thailand